Elimination Communication In Our Family

10 months old having some diaper-free time

Before Burkley was born, I had read about elimination communication. The theory interested me and made sense, but I felt a bit overwhelmed at the idea of it as a new mom. Once I really felt "in the groove" as a mom, around six to seven months of being a mom, I started reading more and more about elimination communication to see if I was up for trying it. We started when Burkley was eight months old. We began with lots of diaper-free time so I could attempt to figure out his cues and rhythms. 

It all started out pretty great. The best hint I read was to offer a "potty-tunity" upon waking up from naps and in the morning. We did this and it worked like a charm- he needed to go every time he woke up. Before long, he was waking up dry. After that, I started to just use the timing method and offering him the chance to go potty every hour and then just watching for his poo cues, which were pretty obvious.

When he was fifteen months old, he got chicken pox, and was so sick and lethargic and dehydrated that we paused EC. It took us until he was 20 months old to get back on track. Since then, I have not been able to catch hardly any poops, but we do catch pretty much every pee.

When he turned two he started to have really bad diarrhea and has actually had it ever since (we are in a loooooong journey to try and figure out why, I haven't blogged much about that though because really, who wants to read about poop?). However, it is almost perfectly timed to an hour after breakfast and an hour after dinner, so I keep a diaper on him at those times and skivvies on him the rest of the time.

This summer we found he was not very willing to sit on the potty for very long, so we started to have to get creative with getting him to stay seated and not get up mid-stream.

He didn’t want to read books anymore and he was too heavy for me to hold him and hover him over the toilet. So, we started finding little 2ish minute clips of videos for him to watch on YouTube. It’s become quite the habit, almost Pavlovian, for when he sits on the toilet and turns on the computer, the pee instantly comes out! Haha! And he does fine out in public going on toilets without watching anything, so that is great too.

I’ve had people ask me why we do it since it “didn’t work” with Burkley (meaning, he’s not technically “potty-trained” because he doesn’t tell us when he needs to go yet). I don’t think there’s anything about it that hasn’t “worked.” The point of elimination communication is not early potty-independence (though that’s often a perk), but rather to communicate with my child. If I know he needs to go, why would I choose to let him soil himself? I know when he needs to go. Why would I not let him go in the toilet? Sure, there are times, like when we’re out and about and it’s not convenient for him to go that I’ll let it slide, but for the most part, I do take him potty at almost every errand we run and every event or activity we attend.

So, when I was pregnant with Cadriel, I had decided I was up for trying EC from birth. Why not, right? I allowed myself the “out” knowing it might be too much to deal with as I adjust to life with two kids, but I wanted to at least try. I had no idea how easy and fun it would be!

Cadriel going potty at one week old

Cadriel’s signs for going potty are very clear and obvious. It’s interesting now, looking back, how whenever Burkley fussed as a baby, I instantly put him on the breast, assuming he was hungry or needed to comfort-nurse. Now I know he probably needed to eliminate (at least some of those times!). With Cadriel, often that’s my first check—when he fusses and grunts and kicks, I offer him a “potty-tunity,” cueing him with the “ssss” sound, and he goes, pretty much every single time. It’s amazing! And addicting! I have only caught a couple of poops and those were both by accident, but that is because this kid rarely to never poops (like, literally, he has pooped only a handful of times in his life—and no, we are not concerned, his doctor is well aware of this).

Burkley’s had some adjusting to do with Cadriel sharing his toilet, but other than that, it really is going great. He goes in the little "red-toyette" (as Burkley calls it) or in the sink, big toilet, or bowl we keep by the bed. Cadriel has gone potty in many places already in his short 3.5 weeks of life (people’s houses, out in public, at church, in parking lots, etc.). It’s really fun and has turned out to be pretty easy—at least, much easier than I thought.

And bonus, all of this equals less diaper laundry for me (though I really do love diaper laundry!).

Have you ever tried EC in your family?